get your prayer on...

being married to charles has brought to my attention that i don't know how to pray.

friday we had a small group of people over to pray for the elections in nigeria (see links below for coverage of the elections). this realization of mine (that i don't know how to pray) was stirred in me at a deeper level friday.

charles led the time and would transition everyone through the prayer points. everyone prayed at the same time outLOUD- which was a little over stimulating for my orderly american self. but man! it was great! there was a lot of holy ghostness too. which can make me feel a bit uncomfortable (and i blush a bit admitting that...) but alas- i was reminded again that my comfort level does not seem to be a good barameter of what God has for me or his values for the Kingdom.

here are some photos of our time...





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this, that and the other...

jen and constance

my sweet friend jen was in town this past weekend and we hung together. she wanted to eat constance but i told her she was not allowed. she likes new jersey and i think we may visit her when we goto visit my aunt this summer in philly.

i will...

• get outside daily w/ constance. running errands doesn't count. driving to the park to walk does. weather it's in the yard or for a walk- i WILL get out.
• figure out how to get more than one thing done (as in completed) around the house.
• paint the three season room.
• make a plan for the garden and figure out the reasonable cost effective steps to implement it in stages.

i won't...

• watch the view anymore. i feel too lame doing it.
• compulsively check blogs throughout the day. i will try to keep blogsurfing confined to one time daily. i forgot how addictive this can be.

things ebele is doing lately:

• smile and smirk a ton. she does it in a discerning way though...
  
• kicking and i think getting momentum to rollover sometime- or do the reverse worm move from break dancing. one of the two- i'm not sure which.
• passing enormous amounts of gas.
• clutching fabric.
• squirming her way out of swaddle and hitting self in face then screaming.
• converse and babble as if what she is saying makes complete sense.
• communicate that her pacifier is 'so 90's' by saying it, then spitting it angrily across the room.

she continues to:
+ slobber a lot
+ look insanely cute all the time.
+ rings hands while nursing

chewable vitamin

"the Dragon is by the side of the road, watching those who pass, beware lest he devour you. we go the Father of souls, but it is necessary to pass by the dragon."
~ st. cyril of jerusalem

updates and whatnot

well if you have not picked up on this- i absolutely love being a mom. i knew that i would like it. but it is way way better than i thought. i am absolutely nuts about constance. shes the kind of baby that i put her down to sleep and i can't wait till she gets up so i can see her again and be together. she is laughing and smiling more and more which is a complete joy. it is amazing how a baby can transform you into a complete and blubbering idiot. charles walks around doing jazz hands all day and i no longer talk. i just make odd noises and screeches to get her to respond and continue her 'verbalization'. seriously? charles hasn't walked a normal step with the baby awake in i don't know how long. he's always dancing or something ridiculous and we have been reduced to being complete goof balls- and unabashedly so...

in other news- i got fired from my job. which kinda stinks and you would think illegal to do while on maternity leave. but i don't really care. aside from having your dignity suspended when your baby arrives; adding constance to our family has certainly changed my perspective on what is worth fighting for and where i want my energy to go. needless to say, it was an easy decision to not o fight for a job that nearly drove me to the edge.

aside from being entertained by her parents each day- constance has developed her first crush. she is mesmerized by red kitty. red kitty sits atop her bouncy seat. constance stares at it and smiles and laughs. it's the best. here's a picture of the androgynous but good looking kitty. the kid has good taste...



i got an ipod and frankly- i don't get the hype. i got a nano that fits fifty songs. itunes has been giving me fits and i am a bit put off by the whole experience. i got it before constance got here- but have forgotten to write about my disappointment. i'm disappointed.

speaking of forgetting... will my brain ever recover from pregnancy and nursing? someone please tell me yes. it does seem that with every ounce of milk that exists my body- brain matter and cells do as well.

charles is just about done with vli. i'm so proud of him. the dude is tired! vli burned me out- which is probably more of a statement on where i was in life when i did it. but it makes me feel a little better that someone as devout and responsible as charles also shows the wear and tear.

in sad news- we're selling the fox this weekend. i love that car. love it. i am so attached to it- but alas she needs to goto a home that can take better car of her. a vw mechanic is buying it so i know that she will be well loved. i will post pictures and stories later on why i love that car so much. we will be a one car family again. this time we will have a mazda. nothing against our mazda but it is boring and mainstream and i resent it a little. i should be grateful. but instead i resent it... a car. i resent a car. how lame am i?

i'm reading an interesting book called, 'not buying it- my year w/o shopping.' i decided to actually finish a book before i start another. we'll see how it goes. i've been reading so many different books that it is hard to keep track of them all and it takes longer to get through them for me. so we'll see how this strategy pans out.

tonight, i'm hoping to goto this movie. please let me know if you'd like to go with...

have a good weekend.

i'm not actually a communist

but i play one on t.v.

i know that this list might look incriminating but alas- i'm trying not to care what people think about me. b/c lets face it- people think about me less than i think they think about me...

here are movies i've watched since constance arrived. i have canceled our blockbuster membership-but really enjoyed using it while it was cold and we were housebound.

accepted: i didn't want to watch this so much- but enjoyed it more than i thought i would. it's about kids that didn't get into any other colleges and made up their own instead.
art school confidential: caricature of art schools that i found funny and spoofishly true of my art school experience at ohio state.
america from freedom to facisim: loaded title eh? this is about the 'illegal' enforcement of the payroll tax in america (among other things). very interesting and thought provoking. you'd think this movie was made by people you could dismiss as nutjobs. they seem pretty sane to me. still plan to pay my taxes though.
employee of the month: a romantic comedy at walmart complete. fun and mindless.
straight out of brookyln: turned it off. too afterschool special-y for me.
lagaan- once upon a time in india: the suprise of the bunch. i loved this movie! kinda the indian version of dr. zhavigo in length and context. very good.
i shot andy warhol: the actress in this was incredible (lili taylor). some graphic scene... you've been warned. otherwise pretty good.
sketches of frank gehry: a documentary by syndeny pollack. casual conversation between pollack and gehry. very interesting.
the lost city: directed by andy garcia who is cuban not italian. how i did not know this- i don't know. this is about pre revolution havana and the effects of the cuban revolution on a family. i liked it very much
an inconvenient truth: not as good as i thought it would be.
the yes men: documentary. two guys who intercept initiations from conferences to the WTO and spoof the 'true motives' of trade in the western world. the one movie i'd say is the 'must see' of this list.
the cooler: i love william h macy and you should too. this is about a guy who thinks he's a looser and how love changes his outlook on life. some graphic scenes.
flags of our fathers: a redux of a redux of a redux- clint eastwood's war movie. how the government exploited war. a new concept to us all i'm sure...
borat: not as funny as i thought it would be. made me laugh and feel guily i was laughing.
my left foot: early daniel day lewis. very very good movie about a irish boy who grows up w/ epilipsey and into a prolific artist.
power and terror: noam chomsky in our times: a documentary about the MIT lingusitics professor who has an interesting account of the progression of war and aggression in america. i like.
nowhere in afrika: a jewish family flees germany to escape hitler and moves to kenya. compeling story, great cinematography and wonderful acting.
the u.s. vs john lennon: INS works to kick out john lennon. covers the subversive art of john and yoko in a response to the war.
bloody sunday: the account of the heat that gave rise to the IRA in belfast in the 1972.
the road to guantanamo: depressing.
half nelson: graphic drug use- couldn't watch it all. story of crack head teacher. some redemptive themes but not enough for my taste. too bleak.
running w/ scissors: very very bleak. did not like.
elizabethtown: i liked this movie it's a love story about a guy who thinks his family are country bumpkins but he loves them anyways.
dark days: a docuamentary on homelessness.
the corporation: i forget the details of this movie but it's a documentary about the worst of capitalism and how big companies are screwing the little guy/common man/woman.
dave chappelle's block party: funny funny stuff.
why we fight: in the same vein as the fog of war (ala william mcnamara) this time it is dwight eisenhower.
lumumba: same director that did 'sometimes in april'. an account of the congolese leader and his assignation and america picking the wrong side... again.

next time i'll post the books i've read since constance got here.

chewable vitamin

"1 So then, since Christ suffered physical pain, you must arm yourselves with the same attitude he had, and be ready to suffer, too. For if you have suffered physically for Christ, you have finished with sin. 2 You won’t spend the rest of your lives chasing your own desires, but you will be anxious to do the will of God. 3 You have had enough in the past of the evil things that godless people enjoy—their immorality and lust, their feasting and drunkenness and wild parties, and their terrible worship of idols.

4 Of course, your former friends are surprised when you no longer plunge into the flood of wild and destructive things they do. So they slander you. 5 But remember that they will have to face God, who will judge everyone, both the living and the dead. 6 That is why the Good News was preached to those who are now dead—so although they were destined to die like all people, they now live forever with God in the Spirit.

7 The end of the world is coming soon. Therefore, be earnest and disciplined in your prayers. 8 Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins." ~ 1 Peter 4.1-8

giving new meaning to 'eat shit and die'

no impact man (read his FAQ section)

and some other links of interest:
eat local
fix
reverend billy

both thought provoking and hard core.